DuBois was arguing that social change could be accomplished by developing the small group of college-educated blacks he called "the Talented Tenth"
It is my hope that with exposure and discussion, we can expand that Talented Tenth and create conditions for more children of color to have access to information and resources, as well as a better education.
"Remember...children are not always limited by their abilities...sometimes they just need access..." Sheila M. Wright © 2005 ALL RIGHTS RESERVED
6 comments:
I stumbled onto this and I can truly say Bravo! This is a much needed tool in the Black community today. Parents, grandparents, and adults who play a nuturing role in a child's life should read this. I look forward to more from you. Again, well done!
Here are some of the Tips I have used as a parent...
1. Envision your child as an adult. Ask yourself, what kind of adult do you want your child to become?
Think about what values you hold dear.
2. Communicate these goals to your child.
3. Create a village for your child.
The key to this is to make sure that your village communicates the same kind of values and expectations that you have for your child. Be particular about who you allow to pour into your children. This is crucial.
This will make your child feel that they are connected to something greater than they are.
4. Become proactive and visible in your child’s school.
Allow teachers as well as your children to see you involved. This makes the school part of the village you create instead of a place they attend for 8 hours of the day.
When possible…make teachers your ally. But you must balance this against being your child’s advocate…You are their advocate first, but advocacy does not mean turning a blind eye to misbehavior. You must let everyone know, including your child, that you are fair… reasonable…accessible and concerned…
5. If you want to communicate a value to your child but don’t really know how…get creative...
Find Mentors for you and your child.
6. Continue to grow and allow your children to see you grow. It is easier to communicate what you gain access to.
7. Become somewhat transparent with your child; let them know that being human is something you can manage.
8. Make sure that your child has a sense of personal spiritual connection.
This will give your child something to turn to when they cannot talk to you or anyone else.
9. Do not allow your ego to rear your child. It is not about you. You have one time to get this right.
10. Talk to your child. Allow them to see that you are concerned about them and that you will investigate the activities of their lives. More importantly tell them that you love them and that they are important to you. Remember that communication involves listening as well…. you must listen to them, and they need to know that you will stop what you are doing…and listen.
11. Show a connection between hard work, planning and success.
Tell them a personal goal of yours and allow them to see you pursue that. Show them how the incremental steps of going to school and performing lead to self-discipline, and rewards.
12. PRAISE YOUR CHILDREN AND TEACH THEM THAT THEY ARE VALUEABLE…IF YOU DON’T..THEY WILL SEEK IT ELSEWHERE.
13. Promote your children and make them marketable! Do not be misled. You are their agents and they live in a competitive world.
14. Don’t overlook the effectiveness of a reward system. Sometimes people need incentives when they are not self-motivated.
15. Don’t just talk about! Be active. Turn off the television. Get off the phone. You have to make the effort first!
16. Remember it is NEVER too late. No matter how old your child is, you can sit them down and talk about what you plan to implement into their lives. It may take some time and this is where communication will become key.
17. Here is one of the hardest tips to commit to, you must remember that your children come through you…they are not yours…you must encourage them and see them for who they are…they often teach you lessons about yourself, but they must not carry the weight of your deferred dreams. Sneak vicarious peaks when you can…but remember they have their own purpose.
18. Read to your child and speak to your child! IQ is something that can be raised. IQ speaks to language. A child with a broader vocabulary usually has a higher IQ. The ideal? Speak at least 700 sentences to your children a day. Yes 700.
o Most effective Parents– speak 700 SENTENCES a day and have read well over 1500 books to their child by the time the child is 10. I.E. What do you think goes into making colors? Do you know the history of this building? What did you mean when you said…what do you think about this picture? Come take a look at this article…Do you know how equity works? How do you feel about the war? Here is why so many people are polarized about this issue…
o Effective Parents – speak 300/400 SENTENCES a day and has read 1000, to 1500 books to their child by age 10. I.E. How was your day? What did your teacher do? What would you like to do today? What is on your mind? What kind of project do you have to do? How do you feel about this issue?
o Least effective Parents -- speak on the average 700 WORDS a day to their child and has read fewer than 100 books to their child by the time the child is 10. I.E. No, Be quiet, I’m tired, sit down; cut it out…do what I said.
Language and vocabulary speaks to IQ folks….
19. If your child begins to behave in a way that is not the norm, or start a habit that is not positive or acting out in any manner…start in the mirror….has anything changed in your life….your home? Next start with the village…what is different about your child’s life…new school? New friends? Did you get a new boyfriend? Divorce? Change jobs? New church? There is always a reason for extreme changes in a child. Do your homework before you take action. Watch for triggers.
20. Give yourself a hand. The fact that you are here speaks volumes to the love you have for your child and your commitment to their success as happy and productive people.
If you make a mistake…be sure to forgive yourself. The more you know…the better you will do.
it's good to encourage parents to envision their children to be how they want to be, but what about parents who dont have the right ideal for themselves. self esteem issues dont stop in high school. perhaps some program should be instated to teach parents how to get these resukts they want, and to love themselves, and respect themselves as much as they want it for and from their children.
Hey She! great blog. I think this is a much needed forum. You need to take this message to the streets. Our parents need to hear this stuff up close and personal. Are you shooting for Bill Cosby's job? I think your message is a little softer than his but it smells the same. Keep up the good work.
T
Sheila,
You have been sharing your wisdom with me for the last 6 years and as I have always said, "everything that comes out of your mouth is so profound." I am so happy that you have this forum where others can hear your message. Keep up the good work and I will be checking in frequently.
Monique
It is as the Islamic tradition says about Jesus son of Mary (Peace be upon them), "A container can only pour forth what it contains." Therefore our focus should be on what are we putting into the containers. When was mandatory schooling implemented? In travelling blackwards, I've come to realize that sometimes if not often we're made to believe some things always were, which in fact, they weren't. As Samuel Jackson said in "Do the Right Thing," "and that's the truth, Ruth."
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